I grew up in the Brethren church. This means that while there were some routines and rituals, one thing I learned for sure was how to pray. I also spent many childhood weekends with my paternal grandmother. She used to host prayer meetings under the big Poinciana tree at the old BaTelCo on Poinciana Drive. This only reinforced my ability to pray.
When I say pray, I’m not talking about polite musings. I mean call-down-fire-like-Elijah-style prayer. I wore this like a little badge of honor because I watched my grammy become recognized as the person people went to when they needed prayer.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with the ability to quote scripture while praying or to even stand on the authority of that scripture. However, I think I developed a greater understanding of and appreciation for emotional honesty in prayer as I got older and life started creating wounds that weren’t so easy to ignore.
Prayer Requires Vulnerability
I think we’ve treated prayer like a well-rehearsed speech that we forget it’s an invitation to converse with God. God isn’t impressed by our eloquence and profound phrases. He’s a loving Father longing to be invited into the sacred and even painful places of our hearts. Because prayer is a dialogue, vulnerability is necessary. God doesn’t respond to phoniness.
We often use the fact that He’s omniscient as an excuse to hide because we figure He already knows it all. But we also forget that we can’t lie about our feelings because He knows it all.
One person who had no issues with baring their soul before God was David. David was the kind of man who, if God asked whether he was ok, would probably tell Him, ‘No,’ and proceed to tell Him all the reasons why he wasn’t ok.
Vulnerability in prayer looks like telling God you’re not ok, even if you tell the world you are. It’s being honest about your concerns, no matter how small, and letting Him know what bothers you. It’s frankly saying, “God, I’m scared; I’m lonely; I’m hurt; I have doubts”. It’s accepting that His shoulders are broad enough to bear the weight of your words, even if those words are “God, I don’t trust that You can do, fix, make, solve, or heal this”.
Vulnerability in prayer is letting the mask fall and saying the things to Him that you figure would make you look weak if you said them to anyone else.
Why Vulnerability in Prayer Matters
If prayer is our time to talk to the Creator of the Universe, why should it be wasted on pretenses? It’s wholly illogical to have the ear of the only Person who can fix whatever you take to Him and not present to Him what’s broken.
Sometimes, we may think that saying the hard part out loud makes the cause of our discomfort real, but baby, it’s real whether it’s said or not. I think vulnerability matters in prayer because it’s our first acknowledgement that God cares about what’s hurting us. Psalm 138:8 tells us that He will perfect that which concerns us. It’s not a guarantee of expected outcomes but a promise that His care and concern for us will guide the way He handles our problems.
Vulnerability in prayer is how we acknowledge that we can no longer carry the thing that has burdened us. God is not in the business of prying things out of our hands. By now, you may know that I’m a The Passion Translation girlie. I love its rendering of 1 Peter 5:7, “Pour out all of your worries and stress upon him and leave them there, for he always tenderly cares for you.”
There’s no promise that God will snatch them from you, but there is a promise that He is always ready to receive the burdens, cares, and worries we choose to take to Him.
When we’re vulnerable in prayer, we don’t just admit that we need His help. We create space for the truth of His Word to direct our thoughts instead of allowing our emotions to do it.
In the middle of David’s lament in Psalm 62, he has this revelation not once but twice. He starts this particular Psalm declaring that he’s waiting for God to help him, and then he says, “He alone is my safe place; his wraparound presence always protects me…”
It’s as though, while he's in the middle of pouring out his heart about his woes, he’s reminded of God’s character and His power, and he’s reminded of what God’s done in the past. It’s that last part that I believe is one of the most important reasons to be vulnerable in prayer.
There’s no need to recall the medication that eased your symptoms in the past if you don’t acknowledge you’re in pain now. Equally, it’s difficult to recall the ways He’s shown up, healed, provided, restored, and made a way in the past if you can’t acknowledge that you’re experiencing the pain caused by those or similar things now.
While His help is not guaranteed to look like what you may have in mind, David assures us in Psalm 62:8, “Trust only in God every moment! Tell him all your troubles and pour out your heart-longings to him. Believe me when I tell you—he will help you!”